Just a little?
Or is it too much?
An age old argument of what’s slutty, what’s classy. An equally perennial debate of what is sexy, what isn’t. In what scenario does a hint of cleavage hold the same level of allure as an entirely exposed bosom? When is something deemed sexy, anyway? And what experience (or traits) do any of us hold, that qualify as to hold dual roles of sartorial judge and jury?
Personally, as an ardent fan of style, I’m fascinated by pop culture, by how it impacts upon life and style. I’m certainly no expert but here’s what I’ve come to realise. It’s the media which sets the standards of what’s sexy. An arbitrary standard that, sadly, has caused many females (young and old) to believe that if you are not “hot” according to conventional standards (read: Victoria Secret’s ridiculous round-up), then you’re neither interesting nor desirable.
From where I’m standing, being sexy has nothing to do with the size of your breasts or the gap between your thighs (or lack thereof) nor the pout of your lips.
SEXINESS COMES FROM WITHIN
It’s not walking down the red carpet practically naked.
Nor suggestively gyrating to a giant foam finger.
Being comfortable and confident in your skin? Now that’s sexy. It’s nothing obvious. It’s not about being obvious. For instance, a form-fitting ladylike knee-length dress is oh so sexy without being overt, and reveals nothing more than forearms, hands, legs.
Intelligence is sexy. Confidence is sexy. And when that sexiness is backed by poise, elegance, purpose and substance, it becomes immensely powerful. It isn’t fleeting.
Being tastefully sexy is about what you do in life and about how you carry yourself. It’s about showing skin, selectively. Never too much. Always just a hint.
Don’t misunderstand. It’s perfectly alright to celebrate someone as a sex symbol. Personally, I’m all for Gwen Stefani and Angelina Jolie. What these two women have in common are they’re both bold, strong, independent, successful and working mothers. Oh and yes, by the way, they’re also gorgeous and stylish. When you’re tastefully sexy AND doing things (be it to improve yourself or the ones you love or the world), it’s so much more alluring and attractive than merely looking hot in front of the camera.
And that is why I’m EVER so proud that today’s installment of Project Sister Act is focused on the beauty of a bared shoulder. Or two. A mere glimpse of skin. Nothing more. Nothing blatant. On the power of subtlety.
Veena (knowing my style)
Ada (elegance and mummyhood)
Sheela (sheela writes)
Reena (fine whatever)
What I’m trying to say is do not ever let the chase for sexy get in the way of what you’re trying to accomplish. It’s quite alright to be smart. To be independent (financially, emotionally). It’s quite alright to chase your dreams and be the boss. Do what you love, be yourself, be healthy, and before you know it, you will be sexy. Firstly to yourself, then to others, and that’s really how it ought to go. Remember it’s not what you see in the mirror, it’s who you see.
Don’t forget to join the Project Sister Act Link-Up Party, and show me your sexy.
p/s my photos by Eve
I link up here.