The capacity for self scrutiny.
(Re)discovering purpose and essence.
At long last.
My third and final part of a series that was inspired by what Chriselle published on New Year’s Eve. My opening thoughts were shared here, the follow-up here, and today, as promised, I’m revealing my responses to concluding Questions 7 to 9.
Honest. Raw. Zero filters.
L E T'S G 0, B A B Y
7. Who has helped me, been influential, or impacted my life last year?
This one is easy. And fairly predictable. I would say my husband, Pierluigi, and my daughter, Eve. They are so different in personality but completely identical in being my champions, my number one fans. And truthful ones at that. Equally forthcoming with the bricks as well as the bouquets (albeit the former would be dished out in a delicate fashion to preserve my feelings, but dished out nonetheless).
From every perspective be it professional or personal.
Physical or emotional.
I would wither away and die without them.
8. What am I really proud of?
A number of things.
In no particular order.
Losing over 120lbs over the course of 18 months. Now that was really (so not) fun but utterly liberating, to say the least.
Partnering with the most amazing brands including Zotos and Kérastase and Forever 21 and Christian Siriano and Nyx Lipsticks and Famous Footwear and Nike and MAC and Osea Malibu.
Attending New York Fashion Week. With my baby girl.
Then watching said baby girl start her life at university. And flourish. That one takes the cake. Although I know I shouldn’t possibly claim
all the any credit for this since she basically achieved it all on her own, I’m still going to list it as one of my proudest moments ever.
Taking huge steps to make friends. And even if those endeavours did not quite yield the results I was seeking, hey, I tried. I forced myself out of my bubble, joined communities, downloaded apps (those were interesting to say the least), and attempted to “connect” with like-minded people. With varying degrees of success, I suppose you could say GRIN read about my adventures here, here and here, and formulate your own conclusions.
Sweater (part of a set c/o StyleWe) Colour-Block Ankle Booties, Michael Kors Bag & Sunglasses (Poshmark) | Faux Fur Stole & Leather Culottes (Forever 21)
9. Is everything I have done last year in alignment with my big dream or goal?
T H E M I L L I O N D O L L A R Q U E S T I O N
To which I do not yet have an answer.
think know I am on the right path. Moving along the appropriate route but I am fully aware that there leaves much to be desired in terms of the speed in which I am navigating my way along this path. Much to be desired.
It is as my husband claims. I fear success. I fear the changes that inevitably come with achieving prominence and awareness. And it is because of this fear that I believe I’ve been intentionally sabotaging my own growth and success and expansion. Staying where I am because, well, because it’s comfortable. It’s safe.
But it certainly doesn’t pay the bills, does it?
I need to sit down and ask myself where I want to take this blog, this business. Do I want it to be a side-hustle for ever? Or am I in it because I really believe I have something worthwhile to say and share? And get paid for?
Do I want it enough to stop making excuses for not posting regularly? And actually create an editorial line-up that makes sense, is realistic, and something I would actually follow? I don’t have any answer for you (or for me) at this very moment but I will soon. I have to.
And that, my friends, concludes a tri-part sharing deal that was supposed to have ended in the first week of January. See what I meant about being committed to a posting schedule? Don’t forget to read Eve’s version of this.
Was I far too revealing?
Did I share too much?
How would you have answered these questions yourself?
p/s my photos are by Sofia Touassa and yes, these were taken ages ago, a year back actually
I link up here.